Thursday, July 3, 2008

To each their own...

Alright, I'm going to try and do this in a constructive manner... but I am very irritated. I had the great pleasure to watch Tyra today, and well it PISSED me off.

There were a few things that they talked about on the show. The 1st was breastfeeding and the second was being a stay at home mom or a working mom.

Lets start with breastfeeding. They did an interview with a lady who breastfed her children till they were 9 years old. Now in my honest opinion I think that is a little old to be breastfeeding but there is NOTHING wrong with breastfeeding at all. I breastfed my son until he was about 15 months old and he weened himself off when I went back to work. I am still currently breastfeeding my daughter who is coming up on 9 months old. As some of you may know, I didn't want to breastfeed my daughter....... but it was for very selfish reasons. My husband talked to me about it and asked me to breastfeed for the health of our daughter. So I did and I DO NOT regret any moment of deciding to do it. Everyone has the choice to breastfeed or not, and for as long as they want to. I choose to do it until my children are ready or I'm ready but to at least 1 year old.

I am a member of Cafe Mom and I'm in a group of Breastfeeding mothers. Its crazy the things the gals post as far as the problems they face when feeding their child outside of there home. My question is this... WHY SHOULD WE MOTHERS WHO CHOOSE TO BREASTFEED OUR CHILDREN BE QUARANTINED TO OUR HOMES? I always feel weird when I'm out in public and I have to feed my child. I sometimes get looks or people may say something under there breath, and it bothers me something horrible. I choose this because it is best for my children and there is NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING wrong with it.

People associate breasts as sexual things... but that is not all they were made for and it is not a sexual thing to feed your child. All I feel when I feed my child is pure love and comfort in knowing that I can supply my child with all the nourishment she will need. What greater gift can you give? And GOD gave us that gift.

I do not judge people for what they choose to do for their children when it comes to feeding, whether they nurse or they bottle feed. So why should I be judged?

Ok now on to being a stay at home Mom... I've had two perspectives on this so bare with me. After Jared was born I had planned on going back to work with him. I didn't however plan on having a csection. With that my work only gave me so much leave from work and if I didn't come back when I was supposed to they would have to let me go until I was ready to come back. So I didn't go back. I stayed home for 15 months with my son. I enjoyed it but part of me had a hard time with it. Mike and I had money struggles and were still learning about each other so every day was a new struggle and it took a long time for us to work everything out. When we moved from Spokane to Marysville we were able to adjust our lives and we weren't struggling and it went so much better... I was given an opportunity to go back to work and at that time I couldn't resist.

In all honesty it was great getting out for a while to have some grown up conversations... my husband and I arranged our schedule's so he was only in an at home daycare for 3 days at most. We did not want someone raising our child so we made it work for our family. After a couple of years with Jared being at the "at home daycare" we decided to get him into an actual daycare and I believe that was the BIGGEST mistake we made. It was horrible, they could never care for my child the way I thought was best.

A lot of people say that children of SAHM's (stay at home moms) aren't sociable... and if you haven't met my son then you have no idea what you are talking about. We did put my son in a church day school for like 2 1/2 hours twice a week so he could socialize with other children. I had play dates with my friend and her children.

I feel like I'm rambling. Ok so once I had my daughter I knew I was going to have to go back to work this time because we had been VERY comfortable with the money we made and it felt like it would have been to much of a life change to change it. Once I had Annalise however it became a different story. I'm not going to go into all the details because I do not want to bore all my avid readers with my long vent here... lets just say she wasn't having the whole working thing, and that was it. We've adjusted and made changes and I have never been happier for our decision for me to stay home.

I honestly believe that my children have benefited from me staying home. But like I've said and will continue to say, it's different for every single person... each situation is different and I'm not here to judge. But what bugs me most is people who say that it's the easiest job out there. You just sit on your fat behind eating bon bons... First and foremost WHAT THE HELL ARE BON BONS? Second, yes I sit and watch tv but it's usually when the kids are sleeping and I have a moment to myself. On any given day I am consumed with my children and my home. My house is my office it is my job to keep in clean and organized. It is my job to make sure that my children eat, are clean and are having fun. Yes we may get to go out and do fun things, but what is wrong with that? My children shouldn't have to be stuck in the house all day because I'm a SAHM. They should get to go out and explore this beautiful world, RIGHT?

Everybody and every family makes choices and sacrifices that work best for their family. So why should one be judged over the other? Shouldn't we all just go on living our lives as we feel is best for our families and just get over it? I am completely devoted to my family mind, body and soul. They are what make me who I am. I am completely in love with my husband (yes we have bad days, but he supports me and loves me no matter what), and my children are the sun in my eyes and keep me going through the day... even if they are gonna make me have grey hair. This is by far the hardest job I have ever had, but it is the most rewarding job I have ever had. It pays me in love and all you need in this world is love.