Christmas...

I've been struggling this year to get into the Christmas spirit. Things have been crazy stressful and just all overwhelming. I lost my job, but before that I was struggling with being a full time worker and still a full time mother. I felt like my family was falling apart... Jared was struggling in school and I just missed my children and my husband. Mike and my schedule was never the same because we were trying to make it work for our children to not be in daycare or whatever to much!

So I guess this Christmas my gift is losing or quiting my job. It's going to make things TIGHT for the time being. But I guess the reward is that our kids will not have someone else watching them (although I am thankful for the people who helped care for our children)... I love nothing more than to be here full time for my children and to be able to care for my home. This is the job I love, this is the only job I want.

I need to take a step back and reflect on the things I have. I FINALLY have my own home, I have a healthy and happy family and I have life... Life is good! We have a roof over our head and although it's not always the best food, we have food in our bellies!!!

I told Mike the other day that since I lost my job I don't really want anything for Christmas... and he thought I was joking and part of me questioned what I was saying, who doesn't love getting presents? But my presents are already here and I love love love my family!!! I think everyone including my family has lost what Christmas is all about. I hate feeling like I have to get someone the best gift, something they really want. But honestly what it's about is being with your family. I like to get people gifts with meaning and thought. So I hope whoever reads this knows what their gift meant from us... and I hope that you love it as much as we love you!